That Face

No words necessary.

Thankfully it's Wordless Wednesday!

The Camping Trip

So. Where do I begin.

The trip down was uneventful, if a little long. We left home at 10:20am, stopped for gas & donuts, then stopped again around 3pm for a snack and a little play at McDonald's, and we finally arrived at the campground about 5pm. We got our tent and campsite set up, and spent the evening visiting with our friends.

On Friday afternoon, everyone started arriving and the afternoon was spent reuniting with friends and helping everyone get situated. Sam finally had some friends to play with so he was happy. By the time everyone arrived, I think there were almost as many kids as there were adults. (If I'm remembering right, there were 17 kids and 22 adults that camped.) The woods rang with the sounds of their laughter and various adventures as they raced around, creating new games and storing up memories. Sam seemed to be feeling fine, although Zoë's nose starting running a bit.

Saturday morning Zoë woke up coughing and gagging on phlegm. She was very clingy throughout the day and obviously not feeling well. Fortunately, I had brought Tylenol and Motrin and cough syrup, thinking Sam might need it. So I dosed her up as best I could. But I should have known all was not right when she went and crawled in the tent in the late morning and went to sleep. She was okay thru the rest of the day, although I could tell she was still feeling a bit under the weather. About 5:30pm, Sam went missing and I was about to start to panic when I peeked in the tent and found HIM asleep. He had been playing SO hard and running around non-stop that he'd just wore himself out. I tried several times to wake him up and feed him dinner, but he wasn't interested. I finally stuffed him in his jammies and sleeping bag and let him be, figuring I'd be seeing him very early in the morning.

Zoë and I headed for bed about 10pm and not long after, that's when the real trouble started.

At about 11:40pm, I was awoken by Zoë coughing barking and gasping for air. She was flailing around, crying, gagging, gasping, choking and making the most terrifying noises as she tried to breathe. After what seemed an eternity, she went somewhat limp. I was starting to seriously panic watching my baby try to get oxygen. My sister's tent was right behind mine, so I somewhat quietly called out to her, knowing that Zoë's coughing would have woken her up. (She is an ICU nurse.) But there was no answer. So I scooped Zoë up and crawled out of the tent, feeling panicked and trying to find some help. Now realistically, all I had to do was YELL and everyone would have come running. The woods were totally quiet so I'm sure they heard our commotion, but I was still trying to remain calm and not wake up the entire campsite. I headed for the campfire where I saw some silhouettes, which turned out to be my sister and a friend. I stumbled over to them, saying "I don't know what to do!" and explained what was going on. My sister had indeed heard Zoë coughing and thought it didn't sound good. By this time, she was breathing a bit easier, but still pretty raspy and at a faster rate than normal. Eventually, we went and crawled back in bed. I knew I wasn't going to be getting very much sleep because I couldn't bear to not listen to make sure she was still breathing, however raspy and abnormal her breathing was. I think Zoë finally dozed off around 2am and I allowed myself to sleep around 3am. To be honest, it's all kind of a big blur. I know I was up several times with her, sitting outside in the cold night air, hoping that would help her breath easier. My sweet Sam woke up about 1:30am, and upon hearing Zoë's breathing said "I don't like that sound Momma." I explained that Zoë was sick and had a bad cough. He suggested giving her some medicine, which I explained I'd already done and it wasn't working. When I headed back outside to sit in the cool air, Sam asked where I was going, so I again explained what I was doing. And my sweet boy asked very concernedly, "But won't you be cold Momma?" His concern alone warmed my heart. I reassured him I would be fine. Zoë was running a definite temperature so her little hot body kept me plenty warm.

It was probably the longest night of my entire life. I think I got about two hours of sleep, but it wasn't the lack of sleep that dragged that night out. It was listening to Zoë struggle for air and knowing that we were in the middle of woods, out of cell phone range, and probably 30 miles from the closest hospital. Also, the fact that we were supposed to head home the next day was weighing heavily on my mind. I am a very dangerous driver when I am tired. There is NOTHING I can do to keep myself awake when I get sleepy while driving. Trust me, I've tried everything. In situations where I absolutely HAVE to drive and I'm that tired, I drive with my arm raised in the air. That way when I doze off, my arm relaxes and falls, immediately waking me up. But I knew there would be no way I could safely make the six-hour drive the next day. And I wasn't sure what I was going to do. I do know that I spent a large part of the night praying that all would be okay, that Zoë would breathe easier, that things wouldn't escalate into a true life-or-death emergency. I did take some comfort in knowing that in our group that was camped we had a paramedic (with supplies), two nurses, a former fire chief, two members of the rescue squad, a police officer and a 911 dispatcher. We were flush with emergency personnel.

In the morning, when I stumbled bleary-eyed from my tent, everyone was very concerned about Zoë, having heard her throughout the night. It was more than my exhausted, overwraught and terrifed self could handle and I was reduced to tears each time someone inquired or expressed their concern and support. I am not a weepy person, but having been faced with a very long night of terror and unease was more than I could take. I ended up crying in several people's arms and being on the receiving end, once again, of all the love and support I've been blessed with since childhood. I was slightly embarrassed to be repeatedly falling apart, but it was honest emotion born of exhaustion and fear for my child's health and I couldn't have held it back if I'd tried.

In the end, Lawrence & Linda insisted I go to their house about an hour away, spend the night and get rested up before driving home. That way I could make sure Zoë was doing a bit better before hitting the road and potentially getting into distress as we were going down the highway. We packed up, said our goodbyes to our beloved friends, and headed to my old hometown. I called Josh as soon as I got a cell signal and told him about my night, which brought on a new onslaught of tears. He agreed that the best thing to do was for me to get some rest and head home the next day.

Once we got to town and had some dinner, I decided I probably should get Zoë checked out, so I ran up to the hospital there in town. We were the only patients in the ER (it's tiny!) and in and out within about 30 minutes. I wasn't very impressed with the care, but was at least reassured it wasn't her lungs. They gave her some medication and sent us on our way, without really much of an explanation as to what was going on.

To wrap up a very long story, we got some sleep and headed home on Monday. I still struggled to stay awake a bit towards the end of the trip, but managed to get home safely. Boy, home has never looked so good. I think we ALL were relieved to be home and in our own beds. I took Zoë to the pediatrician on Tuesday to get re-checked and the Dr. said it sounded like croup (which is what I suspected, although I have zero experience with it). She's still coughing a bit and says she doesn't feel good, but hopefully she's on the mend and will soon be back to her silly, happy self.

Even though it was incredibly stressful that last night and day, the weekend was SO much fun. I got to see all my favorite people and catch up on their lives. I came away feeling so renewed and blessed to have such loving, supportive people in my life. We had gobs of tasty food, great conversation, and made a whole new slew of memories. And I'm so eternally thankful that I was with those people, my family, during such a trying time. It would have been so much worse without them.

I already can't wait to go back next year. Truly.

Happy Campers

Here it is Tuesday already, the 22nd of July. How did that happen?! This summer is FLYING by. Too dang fast. This happens every year! I run around like my hair's on fire for three months, then suddenly it's October and I'm left standing there, wondering where the heck the summer went. Throw in a little building project and life starts assuming speed-of-light velocity. To be honest, that's probably why summer is my favorite time of year. The days are long and warm, there are multitudes of fun to be had, FAIR WEEK, berry-picking, BBQs....need I go on? I LOVE being busy and on the go. Especially in warm, sunny weather.

This last weekend we went berry-picking. The raspberries and blueberries were ready so I packed up the Hubby and the kids and we met Brooke and family at the farm for some picking. The kids all had a great time climbing on the tractors, eating ice cream and even picked a few berries.

When we got home, there was a message from Josh's cousin, Rob, informing us that he and his girlfriend had just bought a house out in our neighborhood and saying that we should get together. Josh called him back and ironically enough, it turns out that Rob & Meg live practically in our backyard. To drive to their house, it's about 1.25 miles, but as the crow flies they are just up the hill behind us, through the trees. Anyway, Josh talked with them and they invited us up. We whipped up some guacamole, grabbed some beers and headed over. I've only ever met Rob & Meg maybe twice, but we had a great evening, laughing and telling stories. Once Zoë started to melt down from being away from her beloved blankies, kitty and "poke" (aka pacifier), we invited them down to our place to continue the evening. So they grabbed their cooler and followed us down and the party continued. We laughed and talked until 11pm, then promised to get together again soon. It was a surprisingly nice way to spend a Saturday evening, considering they were virtual strangers to me. But strangers no more!

Tomorrow I will be doing some final preparations for our upcoming camping trip. Every summer, a bunch of families that I grew up with in Eastern WA get together and camp over the weekend. We started this annual campout 10 years ago and it's always something I look forward to. I'm especially excited because we didn't get to go last year, so it's been two years since I've see this part of my "family". And they truly ARE my family. We all were such a tightknit group in my growing-up years - we met thru our church, and most of us kids attended the little two-room church school next door to the church. My parents and many of the other "adults" agree that it really was a special time in their lives, and they've never had such close friendships since. We all formed such a strong bond because of our similiar situations: small kids, single income, and simple life-styles. Just good Christian people living a simple, country life. It really was rather idyllic. So to go back and reconnect with these people, and spend some quality time is just so special. I catch myself smiling contentedly for days after coming home, and just have such a warm, peaceful feeling after being with these special folks. I'm reminded of where I came from and what's important in life.

Linda & Lawrence, in particular, are the organizers of this tradition and two of my favorite people on earth. Their son and I were the same age (I had an ENORMOUS crush on him for years) and our families spent alot of time together, and even though we moved away when I was 14, I've always kept in touch with them. I consider them as my second set of parents and they consider me one of their kids. They've known me since I was 5.5 so to now be able to have my kids spend time and get to know them is priceless. I talked to Linda the other night and it's hard to tell who she's more excited to see: me or my kids!

The kids are practically turning themselves inside out they are so excited about going camping. Unfortunately, Daddy is staying home because we're leaving on Thursday and he has to work. I started pulling out all our camping stuff on Sunday and going thru it and every day since, I get asked repeatedly by my short people "Is it time to go camping?". We were driving home from Costco today and Zoë asked "Is this the path to camping?" M'kay, first of all, what kind of almost-3-year-old uses the word "path"? And second of all, how many times do I have to explain that we aren't leaving for "two more sleeps". Sheesh. I sounds like a broken record.

Sure, it's a task getting everything ready and organized, and all possible situations and scenarios prepared for, not to mention the 5-6 hour drive it will be, but I couldn't be more excited. There will probably be 30-50 people that camp, including a host of kids, and another 30+ that will come up to the campground on Saturday and spend the day. I'm anticipating coming home on Sunday exhausted, over-fed, smelling of campfire, extremely dusty, and perfectly content.

In Only Two Days!

I went out to check on the house-building project yesterday and this is what I found! Don't you agree that it's an amazing amount of work to have been done in only two days? By basically ONE guy?? My dad helped stand some walls up, but Framer Josh has BEEN. BUSY.

July 16th:

The front of the house: The back of the house: The west side of the house (garage, master bathroom window on the far right):
The east side of the house and back (kids' bedrooms, bath, master bedroom on far left):
Some interior pictures - this is standing by the front door, looking right:This is looking left: Of course, the interior walls still have to be put in, which will really define the space, but this house is going to be big. At least to us!

I realized today that, while I've been spewing forth about the building of my house and foisting picture after picture upon you, I haven't really said too much about the actual house. As in it's details. (And Tammy, I'm working on trying to get the architect's drawing of the house posted, just for you.)

So, the house. Here's some details:

~One-story house with two car garage, except for a bonus room over the garage (appox 380 sq.ft.). The house itself is about 2300 sq. ft.

~Four bedrooms - Sam & Zoë's rooms are on one side of the house, with their bathroom in between. The master bedroom is on the other side of the house, behind the garage. The guest room is toward the front of the house, off of the great room.

~Two bathrooms - both have double vanities. The kids' bathroom will have a tub/shower combo, the master bath will have a walk-in, double showerhead, glassblock shower. Squeee!!!

~The living space is in the middle of the house and is BIG and OPEN. The kitchen is off to one side towards the back, with the dining room being separated by a half wall, but also open to the kitchen and great room.

~The kitchen has a large island (approx 8' by 5') and will have my cooktop in it, as well as seating around it. I'll have a big walk-in pantry, double ovens, under-cabinet lighting, and (hopefully) granite countertops.

~In the hallway leading to the laundry room, I will have an office space, with built-in cupboards and desk. The area is about 10' x 6' and was dead space in the plans until I claimed it as my own. It'll be SO perfect and I'm so excited! It's just down the hall from the kitchen, so I won't be isolated, yet my mess will be out of sight.

~We will be on five acres, about 8 miles from town.

Let There Be Walls!

House Building: A Preview
House Building: Part 1
House Building: Part 2
House Building: Part 3

July 10th:

The flooring is down over the joists and I can walk around my house! The gravel has been spread out in the garage, in preparation for the cement slab to be poured. And the driveway heading into the garage has been leveled out.

July 10th:

Look! The lumber for our walls is being delivered!

July 14th:

As I mentioned previously, this is what I found on my birthday - WALLS! The wall you see with the three windows is the east wall. The two bigger windows are in the kids' rooms, the middle window is the bathroom. The wall on the left is the kids' rooms & bathrooms. The back wall is my kitchen wall. The window will be over my sink.

The wall on the right is one of the master bedroom walls. The window is in our bathroom and closer to the garage is our walk-in closet.

I hear that there are even more walls up so a trip out there today might be in order. Gotta get more pictures!

Here's a funny anecdote for you - Our framer's name is Josh, which apparently is a bit confusing to Zoë since that's her Daddy's name too. We were out at the house one afternoon as Framer Josh was finishing up. He loaded up his truck, bid us farewell and left for the day. A few minutes later, Zoë noticed he was gone and said "Where'd the other daddy go?"

It's My Birthday

And you know what the best gift has been?

Last night at work my co-workers surprised me with a cake and sang Happy Birthday to me. A nurse's aide that doesn't usually work on our floor was there and she said "Happy Birthday! How old are you?" My friend April pipes up and says "She's 29!", because that's our joke. And the nurse's aide replies "OMG, I never would have guessed you were that old!!"

Um, I'm 37 today. I either look REALLY good or I need to grow up.

In other birthday news, the Hubby took me out to dinner on Friday night to our favorite Greek restuarant and then we went out to check on the house. We drove up and I SAW WALLS! Actual walls, rising out of the foundation!! I was so excited! (Pictures to follow.) Not all of them were up, but they worked hard on Friday to get the ones that were built up in order to surprise me. Cool, huh?

Today, I took Sam to his swimming lessons and then we headed to the lake to meet Brooke and her crew. Being the BFF that she is, she brought me this cool Life Is Good t-shirt (we both LOVE LIG stuff). Thanks Brookie! I love it, as you knew I would. We hung out at the lake, letting the kids play in the sand and the water and soaking up as much sun as we could.

When I got home, I discovered that my hubby had bought me flowers and a bottle of my favorite wine at lunchtime and left them for me to find on the kitchen counter. Sweet, huh? Tonight we may go grab something to eat and then go to a park to let Sam ride his bike some more.

It's been a good day and I'm grateful for another year regardless of what age it makes me. As my dad always says, "Growing older is inevitable; growing UP is optional."

Here's to never growing up!

I Want to Ride My Bicycle

The other day my hubby said to me "We need to take Sam to the park and teach him how to ride his bike without training wheels." So last night we loaded up his bike and helmet and headed to a local park. Our plan was to work with him on a gently sloped grassy lawn so that he would have some momentum and yet, if he toppled over, he'd have a soft landing.

When we told him what our plans were, he didn't want to take his training wheels off. He fussed and complained that he didn't want to, that he couldn't ride without them. But by the time we got to the park, he'd forgotten his complaints and seemed almost excited at the prospect.

We unloaded his bike and got his helmet strapped on. He got on the bike, with Daddy instructing him how to push on the pedals. They started to go slowly, but then after only about two steps, this happened:

Sam took off on his bike and never looked back. Hubby and I stood there, slack-jawed, watching him go. We kept looking at each other increduously, and then back at Sam, like "Are we really seeing what we're seeing?!" Hubby said that after about two steps Sam said "Let go Daddy!" and off he went!

And in case you think he was simply coasting down the hill, I give you this evidence of his cycling prowess:

He quickly progressed to the basketball court where he rode and rode in circles, and discovered the beauty of slamming on the brakes and doing a little power skid (which he handled like a pro). I fear Hubby may be right - we'll be seeing him standing on his handlebars in about a week.

I was so damn proud my face hurt from smiling. I was telling everyone in the park how it was his FIRST! TIME! without training wheels, daring them to besmirch my baby's amazing accomplishment. I mean, because really, how many kids just get on a bicycle and take off? I may be a noob at parenting, but that seems pretty extraordinary to me. And if it's not? Well, it STILL is to me.

So naturally, the night ended with this:

Little Beauty

My sweet Zoë Grace.

I know I'm her momma, but just look at that face! She is such a little sweetheart and has had everyone within reach wrapped around her tiny little finger since the minute she was born. As she has grown, her personality has blossomed and it is far bigger than she is. She is a little girl who knows what she wants and isn't afraid to tell you. She has a soft little heart that is nurturing and caring and sympathetic to others' pain. She is infinitely gentle and sweet with animals, exuding a confidence and calmness that naturally draws them to her. She is so much the little girl I always dreamed of and even more than I ever imagined. She drives me to the brink of insanity with her demands and complaints and clinging and stubbornness, but then yanks me back with her hugs and giggles and imagination and innocence. She makes me want to be a better mommy, a better person and a stronger woman. I look at her and am reminded of the dreams I have for her: that she be an independent, confident, content woman; to be strong yet sensitive; to work hard and go for her dreams; to laugh and love whole-heartedly; to live fully.

I am so proud of the little person she is becoming. I love being her momma and am SO glad that God gave her to me. We're going to have so much fun together and I wouldn't trade her for the world.

~ Zoë means "life" in Greek.

Floors & More Dirt

House Building: A Preview
House Building: Part 1
House Building: Part 2

June 24th:

Small pea-gravel has been blown into the inside of the foundation. This'll be much easier on the knees of whoever needs to crawl around under the house. Which won't be me.

July 2nd:

Look! We have the beginnings of a floor! All the floor joists are on. When I drove up and saw this, I'll admit, I got a small tear in my eye. The indentations in the floor joists are the front (right) and back (left) porches. See that white stripe around the foundation? That's the waterproofing seal that I painted on, all the way around.
July 5th:
The framer & Hubby were going to work on putting the plywood down over the joists but the generator and/or air compressor quit working. But they did get all the wood moved onto the house. Also, a load of gravel was dumped in the garage to backfill it.
July 6th:

The backfilling begins! All the foundation work is done, the drain pipes are in place, so now the trench around the house can be filled in. My dad is standing on the "back porch" surveying the work.

Look! Now you can walk right up to the house without falling in a two foot hole!

And that's where we're at! Josh went out to check on things last night and said that almost all the floor is on, so I'm sure that will be finished up today. Next up - WALLS!

Busy Days

Man! The days are just speeding by! We've been so busy lately that I'm having a hard time keeping up with everything. Life always seems to speed up in the summer, and with our house-building project going too, we're extra busy (and burning gas like we own an oil field).

Thursday morning the weather turned cold and rainy. I had a full day of schlumping around the house planned when I received an email from my pal Heather, inviting various friends over to hang out in the afternoon. Well, she didn't need to ask me twice! I had a couple errands to run, then we headed over to her house. Brooke and a couple other friends, Maggie and Beka, joined us. We shooed the kids all downstairs to play, and settled ourselves in around the coffee maker and snacks. The hours flew by as we chatted and laughed, and before we knew it it was dinnertime! I tell ya, I have the best friends. What a totally indulgent afternoon it was - several hours to myself to just hang out with friends. Even though the kids were there, they're all old enough now to pretty much play and do their own thing without interrupting us, so it really felt like "me" time. Thanks Heather for opening your doors to us! What a great way to spend an afternoon...

Friday, hubby went out to the property to do a few things while I put the finishing touches on my 4th of July grub. In the afternoon, we headed out to Whitey's house for a BBQ. Another enjoyable afternoon ensued, where we consumed way too much food, a few beverages, and took alot of pictures. When it got dark, we brought out the fireworks and started the show. The kids all got to have sparklers and take turns helping light some fireworks. I think I prefer doing fireworks at home with friends than going to a big show, where you have to battle crowds, parking and traffic. It was really fun and the kids got to participate. Next year, we'll be able to host the party - I'm already looking forward to it!

Today I awoke with a bit of a headache and general icky feeling. Hmmm. Maybe one who is used to drinking 1-2 beers a night should rethink having a cocktail following by 4 beers. Needless to say, I got off to a slow start this morning. But after a couple cups of coffee, some Excedrin and some cinnamon toast, I was about good as new. The kids and I packed up and headed out to the house where Josh was already working. I finished putting the waterproofing sealer on the foundation, as tomorrow they will be backfilling it. The rest of the day we spent at home, relaxing and puttering around the house. I managed to do all the laundry, clean both the kids' rooms, wash the sofa cushion covers, and vaccum.

I have some pictures to post but for now, my bed is calling my name. Tomorrow will probably be just as busy and 5:30am comes awfully early, which seems to be the time when Zoë wakes up and starts calling me, or else wanders into our room and crawls into bed with us. Why can't that girl sleep IN?!

Entertain me, please

I'm stealing this idea from Bethany actually because I think it's fun! Kind of reminds me of those "Getting to know you" emails that fly around the internets. And yes, if you send me one you can count on me to fill it in and return it.

Anyway, here are seven fill-in-the-blank questions. Just copy and paste the list into the comment box, fill in the blanks, and I'll answer 'em! Just keep it relatively clean - I've got family members that happen by occasionally!

1. What do you think of _____________?

2. When did you last ____________?

3. __________ or ___________ and why?

4. What did you ______________?

5. What’s your favorite ______________?

6. How would you ______________?

7. Who would you most like to ________?

And remember to come back and check out everyone's questions and my responses in the comment section.

Wordless Wednesday

It's Wordless Wednesday!

Last week when I was at work, Josh took the kids out to our property to check on the progress of the house. He packed some dinner and the kids had a picnic in the sunshine atop one of the floor supports.

Ah, their first meal in our new home.

Of course, I think they're technically in a closet.

Summer Sweetness

It seems like forever since I've had a day off, when in fact it's only been three days. But with all this sunshiney warmness we've been having, being stuck in an chilly hospital WORKING, seemed to stretch on for an e t e r n i t y. So now, I'm faced with six days of no work and I just can't decide what to do first with all my free time. I think I may actually be able to venture out in the sunshine today - my shins are now only slightly pink, instead of the swollen angry, glowing red things they were all weekend. God bless aloe vera. I think if I slather my legs with the kids' 50 spf sunscreen and try to stay in the shade, that I can avoid having them re-ignite and send me into spontaneous combustion.

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I failed to mention that I went to pick some strawberries on Sunday morning with my mother-in-law and the kids at a local farm. Our county if chock full of berry farms of all varieties: strawberries, raspberries, blueberries, etc. and the blackberries grow like weeds everywhere. We are abundantly berry-blessed. It was gorgeous and HOT on Sunday (which my legs didn't like one bit) but being out there in that enormous berry patch was heaven to me. The berries were huge and so sweet and juicy. AND SO PRETTY. If you've never picked strawberries right off the plant, you've never truly tasted a good strawberry. There's something about pulling it right off and popping it into your mouth, with all it's sun-warmed goodness, that just can't be beat. It totally takes me back to my childhood.

I grew up in Eastern Washington and we picked ALOT of fruit. Partly because it was available and so accessible, and partly because it was so CHEAP. My parents stretched their dollars to amazing lengths in those days and this was just one way. But as a kid, it wasn't about saving money. It was the adventure of finding the biggest strawberry out in the patch and trying so hard to save it to take home but failing miserably because you just couldn't resist eating it right then. I did my fair share of picking too, but probably every third or fourth berry went into ME instead of the bucket. I remember the farm workers commenting, upon seeing me emerge from the field with my face covered in sticky strawberry juice, that they probably should weigh ME instead of my bucket. So Sunday morning, being out there in the hot dusty strawberry patch was like going back in time. I still oooh'ed and aaah'ed over the beautiful red fruit, exclaiming each time I found "a big one". I still couldn't resist tasting the ones that were perfectly red and ripe.

The kids had a great time too. I instructed them both on how to gently look under the leaves of the plants, how to pick only the red ones and then gently place them in the bucket to prevent bruising. They were both great little pickers and quickly picked up the hunt for the perfect strawberries. And you know what? When we walked out of that strawberry patch, do you know what the farm workers said to my daughter?

"We probably should weigh YOU!"

Ah, the circle of life.